Getting to Know Another Neighbor

It was a day that didn’t go exactly as I'd planned.

Earlier that morning, I’d read a passage from the book Defy Gravity, by Caroline Myss, that suggested we can never know exactly why things happen, or judge on the spot whether they are good or bad; we have no idea where things will lead or what part they will play in the bigger picture.  All we can do instead, is give up the illusion that we have a clue and just focus on what matters most.

I had a sore shoulder – from surfing, yoga or maybe just from picking up my two year old – and had made an appointment with Julie Hammar at the Massage Garage.  A skilled massage therapist, Julie is also a gifted energy worker, and I was looking forward to that special “me” time - especially since my brother-in-law was available to babysit.

So I loaded Ashton and said brother-in-law into our battered 1980 Mercedes wagon and drove around the block to make the drop-off at Tellefson Park.  Moments later, I pulled into the church lot next to the park - only to find my path blocked by a big green Culver City garbage truck.

The next few seconds were a blur. The truck was backing up and, in a state of fear and panic, I couldn’t get out of the way fast enough. As if in slow motion, the truck reversed into me, smashing the front end of my car and then stopping before it did any further harm.

Dazed, I pulled into a handicapped parking spot while the truck’s occupants emerged to assess the damage. The first thing I did was call The Massage Garage; the next thing I did was sit down on the curb, head in hands, and wonder why on earth this had just happened.

But then, while we waited for the appropriate supervisor to arrive, I remembered something that mattered more: my New Year’s Resolution to know my neighbors.  So I turned to one of the guys from the truck and introduced myself. Starting with the basics - how long he’d worked for the city, where he lived, the ages of his children – we slowly began a conversation.   

It seemed like a long wait on that curb. But while my son bounced a ping-pong ball back and forth with my brother-in-law, two people who, just minutes before, had been complete strangers got to know each other a little better. Eventually, the supervisor arrived, everyone exchanged the pertinent information and we went our separate ways.

In the end, I didn't get a massage and my car got smashed. The day didn't go according to my plan. But I got to know someone I never would have met before, and learned some things about his world and his dreams,  and that may be what matters most.